Adventure is Out There!

Hope everyone is staying home and flattening the curve! If you're able to, I urge you to please, please, PLEASE stay home. For all of our sakes, please stay home. My fiance has respiratory issues so he is at high risk for contracting COVID and I am immunocompromised so I am also at risk. I really only leave the house for absolute necessities like groceries and I make sure to sanitize the carriage, keep my distance from the handful of other shoppers when I go at 8AM on Saturday, and I wash my fruit and veggies thoroughly when I get home.  I've been exceptionally fortunate that I haven't had any symptoms in the year and a half-ish that I have been dealing with this diagnosis of cancer.  Recently I started having some lower back pain.  It began as a dull pain or stiffness, and now it's a sharp, battering pain that flares up about once every two weeks or so. It doesn't give me any warning, however.  It's not as if I slept wrong in a strange position or lifted an ...

People don't like things that make them feel uncomfortable.  As humans we appreciate things that fit neatly into boxes, tied up with a bow, clearly defined.  Life is a culmination of black, white, grey and every combination in-between.  Sometimes that grey matter is feeling sad, and I am here to tell you that IT'S OKAY. It's okay to feel sad.  It's okay to feel sad in the same way that it is okay to feel happy about the first sip of coffee in the morning, or relieved when you walk through the front door after a long day, or devastated when a loved one dies.  It's okay to feel sad without a specific reason why, too. It's important to let yourself feel anything and everything.  At the end of the day, the most important part is how we cope with it.  Allow yourself to feel what you feel, and then acknowledge that this is the way you're feeling.  If there is a reason why you're feeling anxious at work, maybe break the tasks into manageable bites....

Well kids, it's officially been one year since I was diagnosed with renal cell carcinoma.  My life hasn't changed that much.  I got engaged, I dyed my hair back to a normal color, we made an offer on a house... For those of you just joining our program, I have: a cancerous tumor on my right kidney, a cyst on my left kidney, a fatty liver and an ovarian cyst. I get ultrasounds and multiple tests every few months to ensure nothing has changed; they call it "watchful waiting".  It's incredible frustrating and doctors can be simply terrible about giving you all the information.  For a while I had no idea which ovary had the cyst and I didn't realize it until another clinician asked me. It's been quite the year but rather than focus on the negative, I'd like to reflect on the year and the lessons that have kicked my butt.  Here are a few things I have learned: 1.  Internal pelvic ultrasounds HURT.   It's a rod with a camera on the end that you ins...

I'm back! Both ovaries are intact, if that's why you're reading this post. My life is still complicated, my health even more so. For now, however, surgery is off the table. This "urgent" situation I suddenly found myself in regarding a "potentially dangerous" ovarian cyst is nonexistent. It is a typical ovarian cyst, called a dermoid cyst because it contains skin, tissue and some even hold teeth!  Mine is currently 2.5 cm but the obgyn said that she refuses to do surgery until it isn't least 5 because it is much harder to separate the mass from the ovary when the cyst is small. My doc also pointed out that while removing the entire ovary is an option, it's not the best one in case something happens to my only remaining ovary and I end up forced to go through menopause before age 30. These were all valid points and so I am stuck in The Waiting Game... again. At this point in my life, I get ultrasounds every 6 months for the cyst on my kidney...

During my ultrasound two months ago to check the size and condition of the tumor on my kidney (for more information on that story see my other post), the technician also did a scan of my bladder. Apparently this is routine but it was news to me and I was unsure why this radiology tech was probing further south than I knew my kidneys or liver to be.  The doctor flagged the ultrasound as "abnormal with suspected ovarian cysts" and ordered a follow up scan of my uterus and ovaries. The next ultrasound came back "inconclusive" due to the images being "unclear". Flashforward to 6 weeks later (yesterday) and I got another ultrasound done because the last two had gone so swimmingly. My doctor called me in the afternoon and told me that I have several cysts, one specifically that needs to be surgically removed soon. There is the potential that my ovary will have to be removed completely. Bobby and I had no plans for children, even in the distant future. Also, I k...

This past weekend I turned 27. I got to spend the entire weekend with my family, not out drinking and partying as most of my friends spend their special day. Our engagement party is this coming weekend and since my grandma is sweet enough to let us borrow her house to host the event, it was only fair that we help her scrub the house and tidy the yard. It was 95°, the lawn needed to be mowed, the carport and siding of the house both needed to be physically scrubbed. Bobby tore his meniscus so he now wears a brace and had to take periodic breaks to ice his knee. I lectured him like any good future wife would and treated him like an invalid, much to his embarrassment and frustration. We spent the better part of Saturday scrubbing until our arms were sore but you could truly tell the difference and I know at the end of the day, my grandma was grateful. It was a hot, tiring day but we sprayed each other with the hose and had a good time while getting things DONE. My family is unfortun...

We started off our day at Ruby's Diner; it has drive up ordering speakers and food is delivered on skates to your car if you order during lunch hours.  The atmosphere was fun and there were plenty of options for everyone. After breakfast, we headed off to the LA Zoo! Our zoo visit did not exactly go smoothly... One of the otters in the enclosure was bleeding and when we finally tracked down a worker to inform them, they seemed less than concerned.  The picture with my stepdad and the tapir was taken right before the tapir turned around and tried to pee on him through the plexiglass.  The leopard threw up a hairball and the giraffe got its tongue stuck on the fence.  Bottom line, the LA Zoo is terrible and don't waste your money.  We headed to the Griffith Observatory before it closed early for the holiday.  We arrived at sunset and the view was all the more impressive for it.  Traffic was at a compl...